pms666.com

I’ve been meaning to post something light and funny after GimmeMeds psychotic breakdown, below.

Homer’s Always good for a laugh.

Just put him in a sports bra and he’s me.

let me ask you this:

If you want a fax returned to you- do you remember to put the FUCKING FAX NUMBER ON THE MOTHER FUCKING GOD DAMN FAX? Or do you just assume the person you want money from /contract from /advice from/whatever the fucking fax contains – do you expect them to miraculously pull your fax number out of thin air? Or do you think it’s ok if they spend 10 mintues searching around for it, only to find they cant’ find it anywhere in your email correspondences!? are you a fucking idiot too? I can’t tell you how many idiot sales people beg, call, plead for money from me, and then DON’T PUT THEIR FAX NUMBERS ON THE MOTHER FUCKING FAX! How to annoy your client: ask them to do you a favor and make it extremely difficult or just routinely annoying every month or so by not giving them the info that they need to do you the favor in the first place. Let’s see how this plays out shall we?

1. I finally, sometimes on a weekend, get around to signing the IOs for my clients, since i’ve been swamped with sales and client calls and “urgent” meetings all week. I fill it out. I sign it. I look for the fax number. I look AGAIN. NO FAX NUMBER. I look for the reps email address. Find it. Scroll through 129 emails and find that NONE OF THEM CONTAIN A FUCKING SIGNATURE WITH A PHONE NUMBER OR A FAX NUMBER.

1.a) Let me ask you this. If you’re a person who wants to have their request responded to, receive money from the person you’re harrassing, or if you are even just a passably bright working individual who isn’t going to wet themselves in fear every time the phone rings, why, on gods fucking green fucking earth do you do the basely simple thing and INCLUDE YOUR PHONE NUMBER AND OTHER DETAILS IN YOUR SIGNATURE. WHY?! There is no possible answer except you don’t want people to be able to reach you. NO POSSIBLE ANSWER. so unless your Paris fucking Hilton or the Queen of fucking England get off your stupid lazy ass and spend two fucking minutes setting up a nice little signature with cute fonts and pretty fucking colors that will give everyone you deal with an easy way contact to your brain/ear/body whatever the goods are your selling/dealing in/what have you. ARE YOU A FUCKING IDIOT?

And another thing.

I spend my sunday filling out unique time sheets for every client I work for. It’s March, and that means that I send them invoices for February and they pay me. Yay. Everyone seems to have their own time sheets that they need filled out, and hey, if I am going through a recruiter, there’s actually 2 per client. fine fine FINE. it’s part of my job and it’s FINE. But it’s soooooo not fine to, AFTER i send you the timesheet filled out the way you asked me to last month, that you TODAY- on MARCH 4th send me an email that says “I am an idiot and I forgot to send this to you every day of last month. But i have a new time sheet for you to fill out that i just happened to remember to send you today -see the attached. This is now a requirement from our accounting team and i’m not sorry at all for inconveniencing you on a very busy monday morning. cheerio.” YOU FIX IT THEN BITCH! i already spent my sunday but since you were too lazy, stupid, and too much of a idiot, you fucking do it.

see what happens when i leave off the calcuim? Is this what you wanted?!!!!!!!1!?!?!?!

i’m going to go breathe fire at my neighbors who complain about my laundry (wah wah it’s too loud) and then maybe flood their apartment. OOPS.